Republicans are supposedly the anti-regulation party, but it seems like the one thing they really want to regulate is facts.  (OK, and vaginas.)

HR 482 seeks to prevent federal funding for obtaining facts about racial disparities in housing.  And of course, they don’t allow the CDC to collect facts about gun deaths.  And they work very hard to prevent government agencies from collecting or sharing facts about environmental issues like global warming.

Clearly, Republicans find facts frightening and dangerous, so I thought I might help them out with a few slogans they’ll surely understand.

First thing to remember:  Facts don’t kill people, people kill people.

And of course, the only way to stop a bad guy with a fact is a good guy with a fact.

Come to think of it, we should get more facts in schools!  Every teacher should come to class armed with facts, and all children should learn how to use them.  Should a bad guy or grizzly with a fact break into their school, only plenty of facts immediately to hand will stop them.

If facts are outlawed, only outlaws will have facts!

Know facts, know peace and safety.  No facts, no peace and safety.

Fact control is not about facts. It’s about control.